cstravato's Pre-k World

The life of a Teacher / Student / Mother

Do I vary my communication style based on who I am communicating with?


This was an interesting question to think about. I will start with my communication style with my family. My family falls in what Louise Derman-Sparks described as part of the dominant culture. In that sense, we are very similar and I do not need to change my communication style to affectively communicate. However of my three siblings and myself we did not all accept the same stance on religious beliefs. I do find when I speak with my oldest brother and my youngest sister who do not believe in any religion or God I use a different style of communication. I try to be more aware of their non-verbal communications and I am more caution about saying too much. I am proud and confident in the religious choices I have made for myself, but I do not feel I need to make any one agree with me nor do I want to make them feel uncomfortable. I also change my communication style when I speak with my other brother who believes in God but has no religious affiliations at this time. I find it is more affective take a passive and empathic listening role in communicating with him because he is quick to argue and question. We have learned over the years that religion is not the best topic for us since we do not agree on many aspects and we do not communicate effectively. I could try harder to think about why he thinks so differently and be more understanding to improve our affective communication.

When it comes to communicating with my colleges at work, I find that there is not a wide range of ethic or cultural variation. However there are cultural differences in our confidence levels that affect how I communicate. I find when I am communicating with someone with a strong confidence level I can freely communicate my thoughts and opinions in a respectful manner and they can do the same with me. We may not always agree but we can openly share our thoughts and ideas and respect each other. When I speak with other colleges with of a less confident culture, I am more cautious in how much I share my opinions and thoughts. I find it more difficult to communicate with people who are not confident to be outspoken and share ideas even if others do not agree. I find I have to spend more time trying to read their body language and facial gestures to interpret their responses. I also find I need to check in more often to see if they are comfortable with how the conversation is going and if they have been offended by anything I have said or done.

I find that regardless of the group or cultural background of the people I communicate with there are some basic rules I follow. I try to treat others with kindness and respect and follow the Platinum rule. I try to be aware of non-verbal communication and verbal communication and adjust my communication style as needed. I try to be honest and clear in my opinions and intentions. I do not like to be disrespected or offended by others and I certainly do not want to disrespect or offend other.


Author: cstravato

I am a wife of 14 years and have two boys, one is 10 and an the other is 8. They are busy and keep us hopping. I have been a pre-school teacher for 9 years with a break in the middle to teach kindergarten in FL for three years, and I had the luxury of staying home with my two boys for a few years. I enjoy teaching pre-school age children it gives me great pride to help set a generation up to succeed in their school careers and life. I am currently going back to school to complete my masters degree in early childhood education at Walden University.

3 thoughts on “Do I vary my communication style based on who I am communicating with?

  1. Christina,
    It’s interesting that you and your sibling all have different religious beliefs. I have never seen this before so reading your posts really caught my eye on that part. When talking about religion to most people can be difficult if they don’t have an open mind. I usually don’t talk to people about religion because everyone has their opinions and they are so strong at times and we never are able to come at a medium. I use to not pay much attention to nonverbal communicant such as a head nod or a folded arm because I didn’t think much about it, but I now know that it’s best to pay attention to others you are communicating with whole heartedly because when you are paying attention and listening then you will know how to respond and communicate effectively with them.


  2. Religion is a touchy topic that can turn into an intense conversation. I found myself losing all effective communication skills when engaging in a discussion about religion. What was most interesting in your post was about communicating differently with those of different self confidence levels. It makes me think of how my colleagues express themselves verbally and nonverbally.


  3. Christina,

    I believe sometimes we naturally change the way we communicate depending on who we are talking with. This class has just tapped into our prior knowledge and connected what we have been doing to terms and strategies we were unaware of. I definitely change between formal and informal throughout the day as I interact with different at work and in my personal life.



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